What's Next?

As I mentioned in my last post, David has had a few schools added on to his time here in Fort Benning. A part of me is really excited that we're staying in the states for awhile because that means I get to attend two of my very best friends' weddings which makes me really happy. But another part of me is really bummed we have to wait until who knows when to start our European adventure. And it's still totally possible we won't be able to go to Germany because we're having to stay here for so long. This whole process of getting orders has been a roller coaster, with receiving orders for Germany in November, having them cancelled in January, receiving orders to Fort Hood in January, and then new orders for Germany in February.

It's been difficult on both of us because we were SO excited about Germany in the beginning so when we found out we were moving back to Texas we were incredibly disappointed. We had a few weeks for that to sink in, and, like a true military family does, we really got on board with the idea of going back home. Sure it wasn't going to be as glamorous as Germany. The sightseeing in Killeen wasn't going to be nearly as awesome as Europe. Our family wouldn't be chomping at the bit to come and visit us. But we were going to be able to get me a new car and maybe even a dog! We were going to rent a cute little house and have our own backyard. It was going to be incredibly convenient to be within three hours of every one of our family members. We could picture ourselves starting a family! And now we have spent the last month really thinking about what it's going to be like in Germany. It's going to be a challenge financially because we are going to want to travel all the time and buy everything because it's different and cool. Our housing situation is totally up in the air and we could spend three months living in a hotel before a house is available for us. It's going to be much more difficult for me to get a job because my choices are only what's available on post since I don't speak German. And, who knows, we might leave our time there with a German born baby! Now knowing that we'll be here until the fall means that anything can and will happen, so it's become really hard for me to picture where we'll be living, or even where we'll be spending Thanksgiving and Christmas. I am still totally holding out that Germany will be waiting for us when all of these schools are over, but at the same time I know it could be any other state or country.

I'm absolutely ready to dig in to our new place and get really involved with our unit. It's rough here since David is only in school and the organization is not that of a real unit. The spouse's groups and functions that we will get to take part in when we're with a real unit don't exist here. I am having a great time here in Georgia, don't get me wrong, participating in all sorts of classes on post and hanging out with the five other wives/fiances that are connected to David's class but I am really ready to be around an even more diverse group of wives. I'd love to be around wives with experience in the Army, since all of us are total newbies. I'd really really love to be around people with kids!!! I miss hanging out with little ones and haven't been around kids in so long (with the exception of the eight week old baby that I held for a couple hours during class last week, and I totally wanted to steal him and bring him home). I just can't wait to be around families and people who I can ask all my silly questions to and who will hopefully mentor me to help me become a better Army wife. 

I know I need to "live in the moment" and be totally be involved where we are, but I can't help but think about what's coming next. So many "what-ifs" and unknows. I really need to stop focusing on it and deal with what's going on right now or else I won't enjoy Georgia, which I totally am and I'm really loving our time here. So, I'm going to let it be and just wait to see what happens. I can totally do that... maybe. If my lack of attention to my huge pile of laundry is any indication, then I think I'll be fine.